We meet again! The 4th wave of terror is here and by the end of this post we’ll have our list slimmer by 16 entries. We think the OEG is getting harsher and more cruel. We wanted to stop incorrect use of the word ‘otaku’ by those not worthy and we think we’ve seen a slight improvement. However the usual suspects are still out there and still at large and it’s our job to take them down.
We wanted to reject these people, but judging by the reactions from the blogosphere they were already rejected before we got here. We’ll think out the idea of our christmas ‘Otaku’ Awards; it might give us a chance to kick some fakers while they’re down and pour some salt in their wounds.
Some people said we were too harsh with SiRiRu. We think we weren’t harsh enough. Rejection didn’t work so we’re starting to lacerate. There were some taboos we chose to ignore, such painstaking truths that we didn’t bring to light in the sake of kindness; now we’re turning it up a notch. Nobodies will be nobodies and will recieve the nobody treatment, but as for the rest…well, we’re going to tighten the thumbscrews and grab the battery acid.
As always, sit back, enjoy and let the violence begin.
Threedeecomplex is paradigmshift’s endevour into the blogging world and is just one of those blogs that makes a bunch of mediocre posts that never really grab anyone’s attention. We had to dig about for some drama, and even then all we could find was more bashing of E2046 (lol) and more hilarious comments by Guy, the blogosphere’s local “I went to a higher education facility and learned how to construct a logical arguement, therefore I am always right” guy. Oh wait, he’s still a student, *sigh*
3DComplex’s tag cloud represents the extent of close-mindedness in the blogosphere today; the series and characters listed are the same everywhere. K-ON, Lucky Star, Shana, Macross, Haruhi, Gurren Lagann, Geass, Wolf and Spice…the list goes on. People call themselves and their peers ‘otaku’ yet are only interested in the mainstream series. And then they think they can insult Narutards and those who only watch Shounen series!? Take a look at yourselves, you’re no better than they are. In regards to this, we particularly hate paradigmshift’s workspace; a clusterfuck of K-ON wallpapers and Lucky Star posters. There is a large community of those who don’t follow the mainstream anime, It’s called ANN And it’s full of elitist morons who would turn off their television in a fit of rage if they so much saw a glimpse of cleavage on their screen.
Are you telling us that there is no middle line? You’re an elitist cretin either end of the spectrum? Someone with some common sense show us some balance and show the blogosphere how it’s done.
Meanwhile, here are some images that generate humour:
Oh, that explains a lot, paradigmshift is actually blind. But it’s cool, it makes him an easier target for us. And look at those mystical graphs to the left! paradigmshift must be some kind of technical genius!
A technical genius indeed. Unfortunately, what paradigmshift was actually doing was running a retarded amount of instances of IE:
We love how paradigmshift italicises Japanese words, in case you just couldn’t figure out what the fuck meido could mean. Here’s an excerpt we found particularly amusing from his trip to Japan posts:
“Perhaps I shall decide on my cosplay for Otakon this year here and pick one up, although most of these outfits were oriented towards shoujo.”
In fact, his entire journey to Japan is hilarious/awful at the same time. But we’ll pick out some key points.
Firstly, paradigmshift is a corporate whore just like Danny Choo. Remember what we said about gamers that really made us lose a lot of respect for them? Well apparently it was paradigmshift’s favorite store and he just loved to buy figures (roll eyes) from it. Look at his loot! As we will detail later on in the post with another blogger, we have to highlight what a complete fucking waste of time and money it was to buy merchandise from Japan that is so easily available on english websites. But more on that later.
Of course! To complete the Akiba trail, the day was wrapped up with a visit to a meidocafe (It’s a cafe, where there are meidos) and what better, more mainstream choice than @home with it’s glaring pink sign and pretentious use of english.
“My meido was pretty cute, and she also did the Moe Moe Kyun! pose as she served me. I then had my picture taken with a maid, but it was a Polaroid. I will post that at some point in the future, after I blur out my face to avoid Internet-wide embarassment.”
You don’t need to worry about that, we’ve done a pretty good job of it for you. Not to mention that the fact you screenshotted all these instances of IE running was enough to prove how much of an idiot you are.
paradigmshift also runs a shitty hardware blog. By it’s own description:
“A blog about hardware. Various different system builds will be discussed here, overclocking will be performed (to a point of course, the author doesn’t have the same amount of funds as those hardware sites to be able to push his hardware to the breaking point), benchmarks will be performed (not scientific or reliable at all, just the author’s methods and experiences), new technology will be discussed.”
So you’ll overclock to a safe point nobody cares about then perform tests with no proper equipment and with no factual basis, making your blog totally uncitable? Pretty damn poor for a blog about hardware.
We could go on. paradigmshift breaks the ‘otaku’ rule many times in various forms (Just look through his posts) and of course was never going pass. Eliminated.
Threedeecomplex by paradigmshift – ELIMINATED
What a fucking waste of time this blog is for us. Some people really think they are ‘otaku’ and it annoys us. Then there are those stupid fucking morons who just assume they are it without giving it any thought. Divine Fang is one of these people and his blog is just a spamfest of the word ‘otaku’. “Shin-Otaku” “Thoughts of an Otaku” “$comment_number otaku comments”. Sickening.
The personal statement couldn’t be any more pretentious if it tried:
“Shin-Otaku is a blog site belongs to the author, Divine Fang who is a super otaku wannabe. Here he shares his thoughts just about anything related to otaku in this very portal -figurines, anime, games, computing, jpop, Japan e.t.c. As of time of writing, he is especially obsessed with:
- Ayumi Hamasaki (since 2000)
- Tekken 6 (hard-core player)
- Suzumiya Haruhi’s figures (all figures)
- Learning Japanese
Set your screen resolution to 1280×800* or above to view this site in its full glory!!!”
We’ll agree with the “Wannabe” part, but the rest is just bullshit that we don’t even have to explain. Screen resolution to 1280×800? Oh we get it, you modified the theme to work on your shitty laptop but you’re too lazy to cater for anybody else.
We’re not ones to stereotype, but it’s like the closer to Japan the anime blogosphere gets, the more wannabe-ish it appears to be.
J-List, PlayAsia and so on. Come on, do you really think your readers are stupid enough to not know about those places? Well if they shop at J-List then it doesn’t surprise us at all, actually.
DivineFang, not only are you totally fucking clueless about what it means to be Otaku, your blog is awful. You have a shoutbox that only you use and acts as a microblogging platform for you (Was twitter not enough?). We clicked on ‘TECH’ on your menu and got some posts about RevolTECH figures. Are you unable to use tags to their fullest extent? You also scrounge for affiliates on your front page, and nobody likes a scrounger.
Now here are a few cheap laughs. Divine tries out Linux:
The very first sentence is totally wrong:
“Like many otakus do, I spend big part of my time in front of my PC”
Unless you’re thinking of a different kind of otaku, we think you’re confusing PC with TV. This may be a tough concept to grasp for those who can only watch anime on their computers, but you’ll find that PC and Otaku is not really synonymous at all and it’s only a select few of us that are beyond end-user level at all. A real (anime)otaku room will have the TV as a main component. For game and PC otaku, obviously it’s a different case.
“What’s Linux you might asked? The answer: Linux is an alternative Operating System (OS) that you could run on your computer instead of Microsoft Windows XP/Vista and the best part of Linux is that it’s free. Linux comes in many distros (or variants) and my choice of distro is Fedora. Head to Wikipedia for more details about Linux.”
The more technologically aware of you reading this will realise the fundamental point missing here..
“The newly installed Fedora 10 works as good as my previous Fedora 9. Fedora can be easily customised to resemble Microsoft Windows desktop with additional skins at GNOME Art if you are using Gnome interface.”
What is really the point in cutting away from what you’re used to just to adopt a new system that you use for exactly the same purposes and even go as far to customise GTK so that it resembles Windows? (Which it doesn’t by the way, you did a shitty job of that too)
“Overall, I find Fedora 10 to be a user-friendly Linux distro and shall be sticking to it.
Other Linux Distros: Ubuntu, OpenSUSE, PCLinuxOS
I have tried another Linux distro which was Ubuntu (8.04 LTS), arguably the most popular Linux distro today but it did not work well on my PC for some reasons. Other popular distros would be OpenSUSE and PCLinuxOS which I have yet to try out. If you are giving one of these distros a shot, use UNetbootin so that you can have these Linux distro to work from your USB flash drive :)
Yawn. Wait, Ubuntu didn’t work and you didn’t attempt to find out why? Way to embrace the spirit of Linux…
“Firefox works perfectly but the fonts don’t look quite good without some hacks. I have yet to figure out a way to make it looks as good as it is in Windows. Same goes to the fonts of Nautilus, the default file browser for Fedora as well as the system wide fonts. Disabling Cleartype (use of Monochrome) in Fedora doesn’t quite meet up to my expectation.”
Be careful of your word choice. You used ‘my expectation’ where you meant ‘What I’m used to’. It truely must be a shocking concept that one operating system can be so different from another.
Either way, his ‘Currently listening to’ list seems to be coming from Winamp, so there’s a chance he gave up with Fedora and went back to Windows.
We could go on and on but we’d essentially be repeating ourselves. We’re sure you get the picture at this point.
Shin-Otaku by DivineFang – ELIMINATED
Finding the Blue is one of the first of the (lazily done in this case) eroge concentric blogs to be featured on the OEG. As a spoiler for things to come, we found that while eroge blogs were far and few between, they were very hit and miss in terms of elimination and ranged from really impressive to absolutely terrible.
Gekkameron and his “Art department” (1 person with average photoshop skills) seem to focus more on the design and layout of the site than the actual content. (There is an ‘omake’ post full of wallpapers and banners you do not want up for grabs too, great!) The writing appears to be a confusing combination of upbeat writing with hints of sarcasm and deadpan broken english. We really couldn’t understand the sudden switches of style, but basically came to the conclusion that Gekkameron is simply a lazy writer.
Eroge blogs are interesting for us because usually they don’t contain the same characters in the images and most of the authors actually have a fucking clue regarding what they’re blogging about. Again, we use the term ‘eroge blog’ for Finding The Blue, but it seems to have deviated into a strange conglomeration of music, figures, other games and posts promising to post more (Yawn). And no, we couldn’t find any technology posts either.
This is basically a waste of an entry, Gekkameron hasn’t updated in a while and constantly talks about how he’s given up on blogging. Nobody likes a failure, but it’s even worse when said failure just won’t shut up about their failures. He hasn’t updated his banners or his twitter feed in a while and the place is pretty much dead.
We looked for instances of the word ‘Otaku’ to no avail, but we did find something interesting. We’re not sure if this is in light of sal9000 getting married to Love Plus’s Nene Anegasaki, but there is a widget asking for the support of legalising 2D marriage via online partition. We’re not sure if it’s serious or not, but as the sal9000 incident blows over, we will see if this is just a phase. Hmmm….
Another shoddy-blog-dull-pass here, but this goes for everyone else: If you were approved and your blog has shown no life by the time we start phase 2, it will be eliminated by default. We might give a window of time for you to say “No, it’s active!” if we feel kind enough.
Finding the Blue by Gekkameron – PASSED
We’re too kind really, it’s annoying approving blogs that haven’t been touched in months. We’re coming down on them heavily next time.
You know how as a kid you would keep saying something and believe it’s true if you say it enough? This is not the case for Rin, who seems to think the more he uses the word ‘otaku’ the more otaku it’ll make him. It does not.
Maybe there is some sort of constant oxygen deficiency to Rin’s brain, but it’s almost as if he can only ever come off as retarded 24/7.
We find with many Otaku Poser blogs, there is always a category named ‘otaku’ at which they can post their interpretation of ‘Otaku’ items. In fact we often use this to measure just how much shit said Author talks and how much we should rip into them.
Then we clicked Rin’s. How we laughed. Rin was featured on Danny Choo a while back for having an ‘impressive’ ‘loot’ that he got from his trip to Japan, where he spent 878,928円 Seem impressive? Well, no not at all.
Even before we heard the number, the pictures were enough to make us laugh at him. Have you seen the goods he got? Rin, we’ll ask you this now? Why did you even leave Canada in the first place to get this? What you have done is the equivilent of visiting an exotic country for adventure and then only eating your native food at the hotel. The goods in that picture are so easily available and such typical shelf purchases it’s hilarious that you wasted all that money on it. Thanks for helping our economy though, it shows that there really is a use for morons like you, even if it means we just toss you aside afterwards.
Look at it! What you purchased is Danny Choo and all his mindless followers’ wet dream, does that really make you think you’ve made a good purchase? You haven’t. All you’ve proved is that you are rich and stupid. You throw around and label yourself ‘otaku’. Do you really think that is how an otaku purchases? It isn’t. Try living here, frequent Akihabara on a standard weekend or if you finish work early, many large stores will push the popular figures because they need to shift a number to sell, but if you look at what really grabs interest, it’s off the beaten path and that’s the merch that has status, not anything with Broccoli’s name on it.
What’s the lesson the rest of you can take away from this: It doesn’t matter how much you spend, it’s what you spend it on. A rich man who buys 1000 tiny family cars is stupid, a rich man who buys a ferrari is a cool motherfucker…or something. Throwing cash at something is not otaku, waiting days in line in WonFes is otaku, but they stopped that now so start taking up running a few months beforehand so you can get in before everyone else; it’s all about effort. Time, effort and dedication will always succeed money.
Koi Aichaku by Rin – ELIMINATED
It goes to show that otaku will always be otaku, but the ‘otaku’ we feature will never be anything more than collectors and wannabes.
We need more hardcore, solid obsessive fans, that’s what makes an otaku. Not just some weak-as-piss sheep follower with a lot of money. That doesn’t impress us, in fact it only impresses like-minded morons who think that the more money you spend on goods makes you more otaku. We discovered the reason for this; most of these so called ‘otaku’ draw their inspiration from anime and manga featuring otaku, which by the way, only portray a stereotyped side of the culture. The side that the general public see; many otaku buying merchandise. What about the karaoke sessions? What about the concerts, shows, signings and exhibits? What about the early-hours-of-the-morning sessions spent glued to the TV?
The point stands; get out there and stop drawing examples from the media, they can only paint half the picture. A little research never hurts, and if you ask us to spoonfeed you, we’ll rip your blog all over again.
We can’t help ourselves; we used to not care, we used to make fun. Now we’re digging up corpses left right and center and fakers are dropping to the ground in flames like flies that flew too close to the halogen lamp. There are no survivors in this game, it’s a four-to-the-floor dance with the defamatory and we’re storming through bloggers like a runaway tractor through a field of lambs.